Last Monday was no ordinary day.  Instead of the regular uniform, thirteen lovely ladies dressed to the nines in glamorous gowns, accompanied by eleven handsome young men, boarded a bus for an afternoon of conversation with butchered English accents. There was one common goal each 12th Grader had in mind as they neared Charlotte W’s house in the marvelous, yellow chariot.

I must be betrothed within the next hour.

Now, dear parents, do not fret for there was no minister present to sanction such marriages. Rather, be proud! For despite the uneven ratio of bachelors to unmarried women, many of your children landed spouses who improve their wealth. Unfortunately, however, the occasional pairing was out of love such as Ms. Lucy Buttons Pantaloon (Maddy A) who married a farmer, Thomas Tickler (Ian M) to her father’s (Mike M’s) dismay. Clearly some people lacked the integrity to properly sort out their priorities.

The Tea Party, a tribute to our recently study of Jane Austen’s Pride and prejudice, transformed your adolescents into spirited creatures. Meandering the spectacular grounds, ladies and gentlemen strolled about in search of a life partner and harmless, amiable chatter. I will have you know that Mr. Darcy was, in fact, present at this social gathering; however, he proved to be a man of few words or smiles and I regret to inform you that he find found neither a dancing nor a matrimonial partner.  

No other property could set such a wonderful ‘Austen’ tone and for a while I was uncertain whether we had stepped off the Magic School Bus or had travelled to an Austen version of Narnia.

Mothers, including Missus Wendy Countrylife (Nisan A) and Lady Mary Brettson (Emma F) hurried to fix a conversation between their daughters — Flossy Countrylife (Jamie C) and Clarissa Brettson (Claire L) — and prosperous, eligible bachelors. The competition grew quite earnest and I applaud everyone for remaining pleasantly poised as the afternoon wore on and couples began forming.

As much as I was interested in finding myself a partner, I was continuously drawn towards the food area, where our hosts Mr. and Mrs. Trousers (Ross L and Katie C) along with Lady Lucretia Knickers (Charlotte W) and her family had set out a variety of foods including a gorgeously decorated cake made by Clarissa Brettson and bite sized cucumber sandwiches made by the BCS cafeteria.

After a half hour passed, every one assembled within the parlor and paid close attention as Cam B recited an excerpt from Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. It was quite the thriller.

The remainder of the event was consumed with much gusto. Congratulations to Jane Bliss Fullworthy (Hope K) and Fitzwilliam Fizzle (Brett L) for having the most financially promising nuptial. Thank you to Mr. Jon Pantaloon (Mike M) for adopting the role as our photographer. We must also thank Mr. Collis for planning this occasion for us, and most importantly, for his formidably accurate naming.

A special thank you to the Wilson’s for hosting this event; it would not have been nearly as successful without your dedication to such a wonderful cause.

With that, I bid you adieu, dear readers.

Until next time,

Annie L